FIRE and FlyLady

When I was around thirteen years old, my grandma showed me an email subscription she’d signed up for from a person called FlyLady. FlyLady (real name Marla Cilley) sent her daily messages with instructions on how to clean and declutter various areas of her house. The emails were upbeat and kind of goofy- she pitched exercises like the “27 Fling Boogie,” in which you quickly find 27 unneeded items in your house, throw them in a garbage bag, and toss them right away without looking in the bag. I guess I was sort of a weird middle schooler, since I immediately joined the email list myself and proceeded to declutter and clean the family home, to the amusement– and sometimes annoyance– of my parents. 

I was so into FlyLady that I used my allowance to order her book, as well as a FlyLady branded feather duster. (I weirdly did not have a boyfriend at this time.) I still have the book and I’m still engaged in battle with clutter and dust. I just checked out her website and it appears FlyLady is still going strong. Interestingly, many of the lessons I learned from FlyLady are applicable for people hoping to achieve early financial independence. 

FlyLady emphasizes mental preparation for some serious tidying work by getting fully dressed and (this is key) putting on some lace up shoes before starting. The idea that you can’t do your best work while you’re still in your pajamas has merit. I’m writing this after just having breakfast in bed, but before I sat down, I took a quick shower and got dressed, and I made myself sit down at an actual table instead of jumping back in bed with my laptop. My phone is plugged in in another room so I can focus and get this post done for you. I try to bring this same energy to my financial planning– Mr. Sense and I sit down together at predetermined times to review our spending and set new benchmarks. If something is important, it’s best done with an intentional focused mindset. I want to have my spreadsheets up on my laptop and a notebook out, not be sitting on the couch and complaining that we’ve probably been going out to eat too much lately. 

Another of FlyLady’s big rules is to get started with small wins. Her first commandment to her followers is to clean the kitchen sink extra well. She gives detailed instructions on how to shine up the sink so it looks brand new. It sounds a little hokey, but the sense of accomplishment you get from a perfectly clean sink is legitimate! The application here for FIRE hopefuls is to ramp up motivation levels by starting with some easily achievable changes. Open that brokerage account and set up some automatic transfers– it takes five minutes. Look at your last credit card statement and add up all the grocery store trips so you know your starting point. Just do something and then bask in the glow of accomplishment, instead of hoping that trying not to buy so much stuff will magically translate to millions of dollars. 

Having a perfectly tidy home or a well funded retirement account obviously takes time, but it shouldn’t take up much of your day. I’m a particular fan of FlyLady’s instructions to work quickly to get the job done. If you want to declutter your pantry, get in there and toss out everything that’s gross or definitely never going to get used. Don’t hesitate or look back. It’s the same way when you’re trying to adjust to a more frugal lifestyle. Just cancel Netflix– don’t peruse each section and think about if you might want to watch something one more time first. Unsubscribe from all the clothing store email lists– you don’t need to read the emails first and see if there are any you want to keep in case there are sales. Call your home and auto insurance companies, check rates with competitors, and then switch to the one with the best rate… that same day! Dragging out the process is no fun and you have better things to do. 

The biggest similarity between the FlyLady and FIRE communities is the shared recognition that our stuff isn’t effective at making us happier. Much the opposite, actually. We’re constantly bombarded with messaging from social media and marketing companies that make it seem like buying more stuff, or the right stuff, will make a meaningful difference in our lives. Of course we have physical needs, but for most of us in middle class America, our problem isn’t that we don’t have enough stuff. FlyLady writes in Sink Reflections, “Clutter has a way of taking over our lives before we even know it.” Our homes, budgets, and mental health are all impacted when we accumulate too much. Popular home makeover specialist Marie Kondo is famous for helping people breathe a sigh of relief by tossing or donating items from their homes that no longer “spark joy.” Minimalism is increasingly cool with lots of subsets of people– environmentalists who don’t like the idea of wasting global resources, parents who are sick of paying for more plastic toys that are played with once and then mostly exist to be tripping hazards, and regular people who just want to be able to close all their closet doors without a running start. 

Mentally separately buying stuff (or keeping the stuff we have) from happiness is a necessary shift for anyone who wants to save up enough to retire early, or even anyone who just wants a reasonably tidy home. A positive attitude towards cutting back on the buffet of stuff is key to keeping on track for these goals long term. As I wrote about recently, I’ve been tempted by some unnecessary but fun sounding purchases. I’m signed up for a fall marathon, and while I’d really like to pick up some cute new running clothes, I’m not buying clothes this year. To be successful, I have to not complain about being deprived even though I’m working really hard, and instead get excited by my progress towards my financial goals. I need to get psyched up and ready to crush some goals, not whine about missing out. Because really, I’m not missing out. The new clothes would be cool for a couple weeks, and then they’d go in the drawer with my other (perfectly adequate) tank tops and yoga pants. Having a teammate cheering you on and nudging you when you start to get grumpy about frugality really helps– Mr. Sense is great about reminding me why we’re doing this and what we’ve accomplished so far. A positive attitude is necessary for any long term goal, especially for a goal as exciting as financial independence. 

So let’s get to work!